It’s no surprise I strongly dislike being in a long distance relationship but knowing I’ll one day be with Kaalen really makes it not so bad. Every day is not always a good day and it’s like that in every relationship, long distance or not. When you are in a long distance relationship it is super important to put your entire relationship into perspective. You are forced to look at things differently and that can be really hard sometimes. I’m constantly seeking out other blog posts looking for answers and insights into long distance relationships but I always seem to get the best advice from real couples. Couples who have been there so that I can learn and to get different points of view on issues I’m having.
This article isn’t about the great advice I’ve received but about the advice no one seems to give you. The real stuff that’s hard to accept but in the end will be worth it.
So here it is, the Top 5 Relationship Tips No One Gives.
1) You will get so used to being apart you won’t know how to act when you’re finally together
Yeah it’s true. It seems silly but it’s the truth. You think that after being apart for so long that everything will go right back to normal when you’re back around each other…that’s a lie. When you are apart for so long you get used to doing things on your own. You get so independent that you forget the norms of your significant other. Not to mention as time goes by you are constantly changing, your personality changes, your habits change and your routine changes. The same goes for your SO. And when those changes occur while apart you’re basically starting from scratch when you get back together. Then it starts all over when you return and go a few months without seeing each until your next visit. So good luck!
2) You won’t always want to talk, even when you miss each other
This is also true. Some days it may feel like a chore to make that daily phone call to check in with your SO. There are days I am so exhausted I dread having to pick up the phone at the end of the day. That sounds terrible but its reality. When you are constantly around your SO you can feed off of their vibes about how their day has gone. Then you can adjust how you connect with them. If I’m giving off the vibe that I don’t want to be messed with, Kaalen can sense that and let me cool off before approaching me. But when you are in a LDR it’s much harder to give off and read those vibes. You can most certainly tell your SO that your day is not going so great and don’t really want to talk but that would just be too easy. And one thing I have learned is that LDR’s are never easy. So instead we passively give off the vibe by sounding uninterested in conversations, leaving out any details about our day, or by being on edge. So do yourself a favor and if you really just aren’t in the mood to talk be honest with your SO and hope they can be understanding and sympathetic.
3) Every fight you have will be exaggerated
And I do mean EVERY fight! It may not feel like a big deal but trust me because of the distance every fight is a big deal. It’s so important to keep a level head when a fight arises. Stay as calm as possible and really search for a way to settle the argument in a timely manner. Be sure to not let any fight last longer than 24 hours. My other major advice when it comes to fights is to NEVER give an ultimatum. That is a major no-no for obvious reasons. It will make your SO feel like you are not fully committed and looking for an easy way out.
4) There are so many ups and downs you may get sick
Hold on tight folks because you’ve never been on such a thrilling ride until you’ve been in a LDR. In any one day you can go from complete utter bliss to World War III and back. Trust me, it will happen so grab a barf bag! Just remember why you are in a relationship with each other in the first place. I recommend trying to not dwell on the bad and hold on to the good. Be realistic in a long distance relationship. They aren’t for everyone and you really have to consider if you can handle it. If you can, that says a lot about your relationship and you should be thankful for each and every day you are still together.
5) Your life doesn’t end because of a long distance relationship, get out and live!
Yes, at first you will be lonely. When that loneliness kicks in don’t let yourself sit in front of a TV all day or stuck in the bed. Get out and do something. Keeping yourself happy and active is honestly the best thing for a long distance relationship. It’s important in any relationship that you have some “me” time. LDR’s are all about “me” time so take advantage of that time and find a new hobby. That way when you are back with your SO and searching for some “me” time you’ll actually have something to do rather than gluing your eyes to the TV. This is the time to really work on yourself so make it count! Who can love you if you can’t love you?
Hope you enjoyed today’s post! Until next time,